Don't be annoyed with yourself. We all need a good whimper sometimes, especially during a pandemic. I wish I knew how to make you feel better. I know I've gone through periods when I've felt completely useless too. Of course, you aren't useless, but I can understand why you're feeling depressed and lonely. Are there any books or stories that you can read online? I know that some older books can sometimes be read straight off of websites, so you wouldn't have to worry about downloading anything.